I Don't Know What to Do and I Need Help.

[jazzman99]

Hi all,
For the longest time - since junior high - I have wanted to be a professional musician. Since my junior year in high school I have felt the desire slowly leaving me, and this past year (Senior year) it's really gone away. I just don't feel like it any more for some reason. I've lost the desire. I haven't enjoyed playing or practicing as much, and I used to practice for hours at a time. I've hardly practiced this year, and it's been really sporadic when I do. I thought it might come back after graduation, but it hasn't.

I've thought I've just been burnt out, so I've taken a break - multiple breaks - and I can't seem to get my passion back. That's OK I suppose, but I do have a couple of issues with this.
1) Music is what I've devoted my entire school career to. It's what I tried the hardest in and it's what I'm good at. It's what I know to do. I haven't made a back up plan, because I never anticipated loosing the desire for it.
2) I go to college starting the 28th of this month and my major is Jazz Studies. I don't enjoy being a musician, and don't know if I will again, so I hardly see the worth in attending college with a musician's major.

But I don't know what else to do. I don't know what I should major in, and I don't know "What I want to be." Actually, I want to be retired, that sounds like a fun career, but that's not realistic...

Anyhow, what do you suggest I do? I have no clue what occupation I should pursue, because I've spent most of my time pursuing being a musician. I am not trying to sound overly religious here, but sometimes I believe God has called me to be a preacher. I'm praying about that and asking Him to show me His plan and calling for me. But sitting here, in front of my laptop, writing this out, I have no clue. I want to be able to have a career that I enjoy and can be able to support a family with.

Have any of you guys gone through something similar? What have you done? Do you think this is just a really long burnt out musicians slump I'm in?

Any comments or thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you all!
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[kehaulani]

Well, first off, don't stay in music if you have no passion for it. Don't do it unless you can't not do it. It's too demanding and material reward is, for the average musician, probably not equal to their intellect, otherwise.

You will be a Senior? Plenty of time to switch horses. Better to do it now than do it after you've got more time, money and energy invested in music. If you're really vacillating, maybe you should take a year or two off totally from academic life, and come back to it with a clear head and more resolve.

Regarding the ministry, keep in mind that you may be rationalizing a move to that as justification for leaving music. Wrong reason. And also about asking God which way to go, (and I'm not discouraging that), keep in mind that sometimes the answers we get aren't really from God but from us, caused by our own need to get the answers we unconsciously want.

Maybe you need a rest from music professionally, just to fall in love with it all over again. The world is full of very good, involved musicians who have professions outside of music, yet use it as a wonderful, fulfilling pastime.
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[jazzman99]

You brought up some very good points to consider, thank you! Also, I realize I worded some of that poorly. I have graduated from high school and I'm going into college.

You're definitely right, music is something that has to have one's all into it to be successful and enjoyable - like you said, it has to be something one can't not do.

In regards to the ministry, I've had a feeling on and off for a while that's become much stronger since January of this year. That was a great point you made, because I never thought about answers sometimes coming from ourselves before. I don't want to go into it for the wrong reasons, so I'm being specific in my prayers so I don't get an answer from myself.

I think you're right about needing a rest to fall in love with music again, and if I make it be a fulfilling past time, I may get more out of it than I have in the last couple of years.
Thank you very much for your input!
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[dstdenis]

It's not at all unusual for people your age to change their minds about what they want to do. Suggestion: go to college as an undeclared major and give yourself time to explore your options. Maybe you can continue to play music at a level of involvement that feels about right for you at this time.
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[LittleRusty]

A music major is pretty demanding of a students time, but you might want to consider a double major.

Also some schools want you to come in undeclared and try a few different courses your freshman year help determine your passion.

For me, I didn't discover until I was a senior in music education that I couldn't support a family on the yearly income. I then switched to a math major, with a minor in computer science and music.

I have had a great career as a software engineer. But I have also been a part time music minister at three different times in my life.

At this time I preform regularly with my church's 25 piece orchestra.

[Brad361]

It's not at all unusual for someone of first year college age to have no clue as to what they want to do for a living, the undeclared major suggestion might be the way to go.

I have a music education degree, but somewhat like LittleRusty I decided that full time teaching was not for me. Fast forward a LOT of years, I've been in sales for many years, I teach lessons part time and do weekend gigs pretty much every weekend. For me, music is a great part time source of income that I enjoy doing.

And of course none of that addresses your problem. If you truly don't feel that you want to pursue a music career, or if you're not SURE, the undeclared major might be the way to start college.

Brad
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[LaTrompeta]

Still being in high, you have plenty of time still to decide these things. But music is very hard and rarely brings immediate satisfaction. I can't imagine spending 4 or 5 years in college and all that money just to study something I don't want to study. I would recommend you start your music major, and after 1 semester, if you know that it's not right then change.

As far as prayers go, I would spend a lot of time on my knees and studying the scriptures. I do not believe that answers to prayers are always a particularly easy thing to receive. Humility is necessary in this case.

[LittleRusty]

[LaTrompeta]

[VetPsychWars]

I were you, I'd get a two-year associate's degree in a trade, for example electronics technology. Perhaps before that time is up, you'll know what you might want to do.

If nothing else, a steady check while you finish a four-year degree at night doesn't suck at all.

Tom
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[1jazzyalex]

Try breaking things up a little. Go busking. Play with bands. Try playing a type of music you're intrigued by, but haven't done. Go hitch-hiking with nothing but your guitar/flute/trumpet/etc and make your daily bread playing it.
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[Grits Burgh]

First of all, your situation is quite normal. Very few people your age know what career they really want to pursue. After all, how could you know with no experience in any field. You have no idea what any career would be like. Probably, what you know best is what your father did - and you probably only know a little about that.

Second, most college students change majors several times. When I was in college, the average was something like 6 changes. I started out in journalism, switched to economics and then settled on business administration. I graduated and never worked for a business in my life (good thing too because I'm lousy at making business decisions).

Third, God is sovereign. He controls all things. If you believe that, there is no reason to worry. God will not let you starve.

Fourth, I think that the above advice is very good: do not to pursue music unless you are one of those people so consumed with passion for music that you cannot NOT pursue music. I would say the same thing about the ministry. If you are not consumed with a passion for studying scripture, look for another career.

Finally, it isn't a bad idea to pursue something that promises a living wage even if it has no immediate appeal to you. Yes, the decisions that you make today will effect your future. However, if you just learn to show up with a good attitude and work your butt off, opportunities will come your way. If you are the best at what you do in practically any field, you will do just fine.

I'm over 60 and only in the last few years did I finally figure out what I really wanted to do for a career - and I never did it. I harbor no regrets, however.

Warm regards,
Grits
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[1jazzyalex]

[Lionel]

You sound like a very bright fellow with a strong
passion for life. Burning out on the business side of music and entertainment is natural. As the ego and stupidity of personalities in authority will drive you nuts.

So don't put yourself down for your inability to enjoy playing "raindrops keep falling on my head" six times a week.

Instead?

Consider doing what Herb Alpert did in 1962.

He controlled all the shots. Controlled all the recirdings, promotional materiale EVERYTHING-!
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[drboogenbroom]

If you are uncertain about majoring in music right now, that is fine. I would at least take lessons and get into one of the college bands. Depending on your high school, playing in college is almost certain to be a different experience one way or the other. Give it a shot but don't worry if something you thought you wanted when you were 12 turns out to not be what you want at 18.

Kevin
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[VetPsychWars]

[Don Herman rev2]

[DaveH]

I think you will hear many things and some will probably appear contradictory....some are fairly accurate and some are dubious. In the end, the decisions will have to be made by you personally, which is an obvious statement but true, because you are the one who actually knows yourself and what you really want out of life. You must be truthful with yourself.

It seems to me that you are going through a normal process of growing up and maturation and perhaps experiencing some personal changes yourself. All that seems to me to be pretty much normal and experienced by many people. I have always been skeptical of people who say that they knew exactly what they have wanted to spend their lives doing at an early time or age....maybe in a few cases, but I think that is the exception and not the rule.

I'd probably not choose to major in music at this time in college. Most colleges require a number of general college courses in order to graduate regardless of major. I'd start by taking those - you'll have to do so eventually anyway. I'd take a long look at myself and and my strengths and weaknesses. Maybe discuss all that with a respected and trusted person who knows something and won't try to tell you that you can do whatever you want if you just have enough desire and work hard enough at it. Those are important factors, but I strongly believe there's more to the big picture than that alone.

The two questions, in my opinion, are what are you good at and what do you enjoy. If you can combine those two things, then I think you are getting toward the answer. However, the problem that I see for young people today is that the rate of change, especially technologically, makes any sort of future prediction difficult. In other words, what is true today probably won't be true tomorrow.

In the music business, timing and being in the right place at the right time are everything. You can be prepared, but if your place and timing is wrong, it's not going to happen. There are a lot of great musicians who are struggling. Being in the right place and at the right time is a tremendous factor in a music performance career. I strongly believe that there are forces beyond a person's control in how all that turns out. I think there's simply a lot of luck involved. Thousands and thousands play the instrument - relatively few make a good and reliable living at it.

My father, who was a highly successful high school band director for many years, told me many years ago that if I wanted to be involved with music in a reliable, regular, "job-like" way of making a living that music education would be the best way to do that. I did not end up doing that, but I have always believed he was right. I highly recommend against music education as a field, however, unless a person has a strong desire to be a teacher first and foremost. Even then, many people leave education because it doesn't work out the way they thought it would, for any number of reasons. Let me just say that I have been an educator (not music) for 30 years.

You are asking honest and normal questions and it isn't necessary to answer them all immediately. And, over time, the answers may change. You may make several changes and possible "reinventions" of yourself over a lifetime; this seems to be becoming much more common than in the past.

I think that ministry is a calling to be the "shepherd of a flock"....I don't think you choose it as much as God chooses it for you. I consider the pastoral ministry as a calling rather than a career choice. I'd suggest to get together with a pastor and talk this over. I don't know you, so I cannot say any more than that.

Best wishes as you work on this....I can relate to it....I was in a very similar position many, many years ago.

(Edited for accuracy and content).

[Robert P]

How do you feel about animals? Something I would consider is Veterinary medicine. Seems like it's fairly resistant to economic fluctuations, you don't have the same malpractice worries of a human doctor.

Getting into vet school is extremely competitive and the coursework is tough. Endless chemistry classes as I understand it. And it's expensive. Unless you come from money you'll be paying off student loans for a long time.
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