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Trumpet player jokes!


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1962 Conn 38a
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Joined: 17 Dec 2015
Posts: 53

PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 4:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I now have 5 posts,
but I have absolutely nothing to sell in the Marketplace.

What was I thinking??????

Rocky
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1962 Conn 38a
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Joined: 17 Dec 2015
Posts: 53

PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 8:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have a coronet for sale.

The coronet is a Wick 4B model according to the little end of the coronet.

I played the coronet for one week back in junior high school.

The three plungers move up and down good.

The coronet is in really good shape.
You can barely see the two nail holes where I mounted the coronet on my bedroom wall.

One dummy asked me if the slides work OK.
Duh !!!!!!!!
This is a coronet, not a trombone.

I'm only asking $1,000, which is a bargain cause I'm including a half bottle of Al Cass oil and a Harmon muffler for FREE.

The coronet is silver, and my bathroom scale says that it weighs about 2 pounds,
so 2 pounds of silver makes the coronet worth a fortune in scrap metal alone !!!!

If interested, send me an email.
But it might take me a few weeks to get back to you,
cause I'm still trying to figure out how to get email out of my spam folder.

And be sure to mark me as one of your favorite eBay sellers.
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RandyTX
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Joined: 25 Mar 2010
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 9:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

A "coronet" is *not* what you think it is. A cornet is something altogether different.

That of course has little to do with you trying to sell something at the end of a randomly chosen thread on trumpet jokes, unless that is in fact your joke.
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1962 Conn 38a
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Joined: 17 Dec 2015
Posts: 53

PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 9:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

RandyTX wrote:
A "coronet" is *not* what you think it is. A cornet is something altogether different.

That of course has little to do with you trying to sell something at the end of a randomly chosen thread on trumpet jokes, unless that is in fact your joke.


I'm guilty of posting a silly parody in a thread full of jokes?

Give to the March of Dimes.

Find a cure for those who are born without a sense of humor.





Unfortunately, every line of that parody is based on actual things said to me by eBay sellers over the years

Rocky
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oldenick
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Joined: 17 Oct 2007
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Location: Naugatuck CT

PostPosted: Mon Dec 21, 2015 7:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why don't 800 lb. gorillas play the trumpet?

They're just too damn sensitive.



How do you pick out a trombonists kid at the playground?

He can't swing and he's always complaining about the slide.
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1962 Conn 38a
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Joined: 17 Dec 2015
Posts: 53

PostPosted: Mon Dec 21, 2015 9:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

oldenick wrote:
Why don't 800 lb. gorillas play the trumpet?

They're just too damn sensitive.


Bill Chase said that he once used so much mouthpiece pressure that he bent his trumpet in half during a concert.

So I suspect that he was half gorilla

He spoke softly and carried a big trumpet.

Rocky
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number juan
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Joined: 15 Dec 2015
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 31, 2015 12:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wanna hear a joke? Drummers. Wanna hear another joke? My life. Maybe I should be a comedian, at least then I'll earn more than playing trumpet.
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Harry Hilgers
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Joined: 16 Jun 2015
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 25, 2016 11:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

1962 Conn 38a wrote:
I have a coronet for sale.

The coronet is in really good shape. This is a coronet, not a trombone.

I'm only asking $1,000, which is a bargain cause I'm including a half bottle of Al Cass oil and a Harmon muffler for FREE.

The coronet is silver.


Does your silver coronet look like this one? If so, you may want to use Penzoil instead of Al Cass.

Also, I don't know if the muffler on this coronet is made by Harmon .....

link

🎺🎺🎺🍻🍻🍻
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Eddie Jeffries
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Joined: 13 Feb 2017
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Location: United States

PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2017 4:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

How to dress a deer:

1. Go to JC Penney

2. Buy a pink dress

...

A trumpet player returned his new vacuum to the store.
The store employee asked, "Reason for return?"
The trumpet player replied, "This sucks."
(A cornet player would have been more astute. BTW, "astute" is one word, not two.)
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iiipopes
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Joined: 29 Jun 2015
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2017 7:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

A good joke about a "coronet" would be the crowning achievement of trumpet jokes.
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Eddie Jeffries
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Joined: 13 Feb 2017
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Location: United States

PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2017 10:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

iiipopes wrote:
A good joke about a "coronet" would be the crowning achievement of trumpet jokes.


I have the world's only 1961 Conn 9A with a chin strap.

Without the chin strap, the darn thing kept falling off.
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BrianCade1
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Joined: 03 Jun 2016
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 18, 2017 5:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why did the trumpet player cross the road?
So he could tell the chicken he did it better.
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blbaumgarn
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Joined: 26 Jul 2017
Posts: 705

PostPosted: Mon Nov 20, 2017 4:34 am    Post subject: Trumpet player jokes Reply with quote

A while back when I was just getting back into playing I went to a couple of the shops in town and visited with one fellow still active and we were jawing about our favorite players. He likes Phil Smith and really favored Adolf Herseth. Just to stir the waters I told him that Wynton Marsalis would play perpetual motion and have a full cup of coffee gone before those two could finish. Than I added that Maynard Ferguson would be on his second carafe' of good wine. At this point he looked a little perturbed until I started laughing. I told him all those I listed were gods of the instrument to me. I enjoy listening to 'em all but I had to tweek it just a little. Was I wrong??
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blbaumgarn
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 20, 2017 4:39 am    Post subject: Trumpet Player Jokes Reply with quote

A jazz trumpeter I met years ago said he hated playing his best riffs and improv to a pot smoking audience because they never cheered or applauded until after they got home!
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fraserhutch
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Joined: 09 Oct 2006
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PostPosted: Wed May 23, 2018 9:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Poe's Law in action

1962 Conn 38a wrote:
RandyTX wrote:
A "coronet" is *not* what you think it is. A cornet is something altogether different.

That of course has little to do with you trying to sell something at the end of a randomly chosen thread on trumpet jokes, unless that is in fact your joke.


I'm guilty of posting a silly parody in a thread full of jokes?

Give to the March of Dimes.

Find a cure for those who are born without a sense of humor.





Unfortunately, every line of that parody is based on actual things said to me by eBay sellers over the years

Rocky

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iiipopes
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Joined: 29 Jun 2015
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PostPosted: Thu May 24, 2018 6:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

What does a tuba player say when he meets another tuba player?
- Hi! Glad to meet you. First round is on me.

What does a jazz double bass player say when he meets another jazz double bass player?
- No, you can't have my gig.

What does a trumpet player say when he meets another trumpet player?
- Hi! I'm better than you are.
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Lawlertpt
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Joined: 12 Jun 2018
Posts: 1
Location: NY, NY

PostPosted: Sun Jul 25, 2021 9:23 am    Post subject: trumpet joke Reply with quote

Forgive me if this was already posted:
How many trumpet players does it take to change a lightbulb?
three,
the first to step up onto the chair and reach up to the light fixture.
the second to kick the chair out from under him.
the third to state: "ahhh, he wouldn't have been able to get up that high anyway."
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ChriZZ83
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Joined: 22 Aug 2021
Posts: 16
Location: Germany, NRW, 47533 Kleve

PostPosted: Sun Aug 22, 2021 4:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Q: What have 2nd trumpeters and Jesus Christ in common?
A: They sit at Gods right hand.
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Gregory Gilmore
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Joined: 20 Oct 2005
Posts: 128

PostPosted: Mon Aug 23, 2021 12:39 pm    Post subject: Trumpet jokes... Reply with quote

A jazz trumpet player stumbles into a coffee shop one afternoon. He peruses the menu and the world weary waitress comes over and says "What'll you have, sweetie?" The trumpet player looks at her over his sunglasses and says "Hey, man...how's the pie?" She looks over her shoulder at the empty dessert tray and says "The pie is gone." The trumpet player replies "Cool, man...in that case, I'll have TWO slices!"
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Liberty Lips
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PostPosted: Sat Oct 23, 2021 10:02 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Q: What's the difference between Nikolas Cruz and a trumpet solo?

A: Nikolas Cruz left survivors.
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