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Is it time for me to quit?


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feedback@stomvi-usa
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 09, 2016 10:02 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Teach, offer very affordable lessons to young players that need help. This will change your focus and find you a new path.

Best,

Jon
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rockford
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Joined: 03 Aug 2007
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 21, 2016 6:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sounds to me like taking a break would be a good idea. That's a lot different than quitting. It might be time to re-define goals and ambitions. Most of us here have been through that a couple times with work or in our personal lives. It comes with the territory of being human. Consider trying out a new sport or hobby. Maybe try out a new instrument and approach it recreationally. I like bass guitar because it opens up a lot of music, like classic rock, where trumpet isn't used much. Some of the other guys mentioned counciling which might be a good idea. Clearly there's some pain going on that you could use some help with. Discussing this with real life friends and our internet acquaintances here is a good first step, but we're not pros in the therapy arena. Maybe some change can breath new life into your music? Best wishes.
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cantusemyrealname
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Joined: 02 Mar 2016
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 12, 2017 5:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Update:

It's been almost 10 months since I wrote the OP, and I'm happy to report that I'm doing a lot better now and haven't quit. Looking back, I had become deeply uninspired by my gigs and students at the time. Since then I've stopped teaching, and I've stopped playing certain gigs with depressing and uninspiring people and/or repertoire. Since I don't depend solely on music for income, it was the right decision.

Instead, I went to take a lesson from a teacher I never worked with previously, but whose playing I had always admired. He was able to help me get my head on straight, and in the last couple of months I've been really going at it in the practice room. I feel like my mojo is back. Maybe not 100% yet, but 90% at least. I don't feel alienated from the horn or from music like I did 9 months ago. Things have definitely improved. I'm buying a new C horn, I put together some new fundamentals routines, and I'm tackling some new repertoire. Who knows, I may even take some auditions again in the near future. Anyway, I'm a lot happier now. Just figured I'd share the positive vibe!
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jaysonr
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 13, 2017 8:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

That's awesome news; thanks for the update!
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trombahonker
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Joined: 30 Nov 2004
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Location: GA

PostPosted: Sat Jan 14, 2017 4:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

(Edit: just realized that the original post was 10 months ago, but I guess I'm just going to leave my answer anyway)


Athos wrote:
Short answer: The best way to find out if the shoes fit is to try them on. After some professional setbacks in the mid-90's, I quit the trumpet. ...
That lasted for almost two weeks.


I essentially "quit" the trumpet, but it was for about 3 1/2 years, which allowed me to tryout a bunch of other things; I wouldn't take it back for anything. At some point I couldn't ignore that music constantly came back to the forefront of my thought, so I came back.


cantusemyrealname wrote:
except for the biggest gigs (NY Phil, San Francisco, etc) that I don't think I have a reasonable chance of winning because I simply don't play at that level on a day-to-day basis


Then who does have a chance of winning them? Only people who play in big jobs already? No, plenty of people get these jobs out of situations where they aren't "playing on that level on a day-to-day basis". If you think your present situation, re not playing with a high-enough level group, is the source of your frustration, then you MUST find a way to up your level. It's up to you to find a way to get yourself playing up to that level, then to take that to one of those big auditions and be that player.

If that doesn't resonate with you, then maybe you should quit for a while and see how it feels. And/or fly to NYC, Chicago, Boston and hear a concert of some rep you really like, see if you get drawn in and really want it when you're in the presence "of that level".
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trickg
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 14, 2017 6:02 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It sounds to me like the original poster may be dealing with a mild case of depression. The apathy that depression can bring doesn't alway hit every aspect of life - the OP still enjoys the playing, just not the gigging and association with other people in the industry.

With that said, it's not always a bad idea to take a break from something - sometimes we need to be reminded just why it is we do what we do.

When I left the active duty military band program in 1999, I was burnt out. When I stopped, I thought I was going to leave it all behind me. I was going to stop playing, focus on my new career in information technology, become a soccer and sports dad, and do all of the normal things your typical cookie-cutter suburbanite dad does.

I didn't realize just how much I missed it until a friend of mine called me up about a year and a half later to ask if I could sub 3rd book for a 1-set big band gig. The gig was a bit more than a month out, which gave me enough time to get my chops together enough for it, so I took the gig.

Then I realized just how big of a hole there was in my life, and I realized that I'm a musician at heart - I may not be a fantastic player, but I LOVE making music with other people and sharing it with an audience.

I continued to gig with that big band whenever they needed a sub - which was just about every gig - and got involved in some other things.

In recent times I've reacquired my love of playing more classically oriented music. My gigging for the longest time was mostly relegated to playing in the wedding band, which is a different kind of playing and a different approach, so I'm working on becoming a more rounded player again.

To the OP, if you are still following this thread, I hope you did take a break from it. That's really the only way you'll know if it was time for you to hang it up. If you ever get to where you miss it, you are a known quantity where you live, so you'll find yourself teaching and gigging again if that's what you want to do. It might take some time to build it back up again to where you want it, but you can do it.
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Richard III
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Joined: 22 May 2007
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 14, 2017 7:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

cantusemyrealname wrote:
Update:

It's been almost 10 months since I wrote the OP, and I'm happy to report that I'm doing a lot better now and haven't quit. Looking back, I had become deeply uninspired by my gigs and students at the time. Since then I've stopped teaching, and I've stopped playing certain gigs with depressing and uninspiring people and/or repertoire. Since I don't depend solely on music for income, it was the right decision.

Instead, I went to take a lesson from a teacher I never worked with previously, but whose playing I had always admired. He was able to help me get my head on straight, and in the last couple of months I've been really going at it in the practice room. I feel like my mojo is back. Maybe not 100% yet, but 90% at least. I don't feel alienated from the horn or from music like I did 9 months ago. Things have definitely improved. I'm buying a new C horn, I put together some new fundamentals routines, and I'm tackling some new repertoire. Who knows, I may even take some auditions again in the near future. Anyway, I'm a lot happier now. Just figured I'd share the positive vibe!


Just adding the quote so people can see he resolved the issue and is much happier now. Nice.
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