Oh Lordy...

trump_it · Veteran Member Joined: 16 Mar 2003 Posts: 319

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2577083109&category=41400
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2003 All-State Musician

trumpetmike · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 12:46 pm Post subject:

Can I be the first to say - oh wow - I want one.

That looks amazing.

Say what you like about this guy, the designs are quite fantastical.

I have read all the threads about this guy on TH, this is not any comment about how it will play, I'm just saying that it looks amazing!

Not sure it would look quite right in a symphony orchestra though

trump_it · Veteran Member Joined: 16 Mar 2003 Posts: 319

It does look quite stunning. I haven't decided if I like it or not though. It may need to grow on me. Perhaps larger, more suggestive pictures would help too.

Worth 4 grand? Not to me. If I were to buy a horn based just on looks, it would be an Eclipse. But that's just me.
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2003 All-State Musician

PatchesTheCat · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 1:22 pm Post subject:

I'm sorry if this sounds derogatory, but I think it looks stupid. Can the guy slap any more crap on it? I mean it does have a monette quality to it, but I would think it looks better without all that lightbolt crap on the bell. While he's modifying I would rip off the old bell and put on a larger and heavier one. $4000 for what he's doing...I don't think so.

To each his own I guess.

[Parody]
"Modifications are based on the scientific principles of energy. When playing a standard horn energy is lost in vibration of the tubing. HMT Modifications focus on air column efficiency by reducing this energy loss. The result is greatly improved sound, slotting, dynamics, range and response."

If anyone would like to contract me to make them a trumpet out of lead, please email me. The cost will be $7,000 for my patented antivibration physics technology. However my physics principles tell me you will get a slower, unimproved response...so if you are not able to play on one of my trumpets easily, you are obviously playing the wrong way. My book on how to play is $39.95 for the arabic print, and an extra $29.95 for the english translation. Each trumpet comes with a guaranteed double C mouthpiece. My trumpet builds strength in the corners of the face and the supporting musculature in the arms and legs due to its amazing weight. We recommend you purchase creatine monohydrate and load 1 hour prior to practicing for maximum power.

offer details: double c not guaranteed. trumpet will sound like a dead sea otter is trapped in it. no returns, all sales final. please do not use trumpet as a blunt instrument. may cause muscular damage on long gigs. do not use trumpet if you are taking maoi's, ace inhibitors, or beta blockers. do not use if allergic to sulfonamides. side effects include vomitting, loss of appetite, and ability to with stand x-ray radiation for longer periods of time without risk of cancer. these claims are based on no scientific evidence at all. i seriously can't believe you have read this far, give yourself a pat on the back. ok stop patting yourself. now go test play a schilke today. i recommend a B6.

trump_it · Veteran Member Joined: 16 Mar 2003 Posts: 319

That is way too funny! I am curious as to how his modified horns play though. I'd like to try one someday.

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Nathan Meredith

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New York State 2003 Conference All-State Musician

[ This Message was edited by: trump_it on 2003-12-06 16:26 ]

HorneyMikey · Veteran Member Joined: 18 Jun 2003 Posts: 325

What the h*ll is it?

Do you need a Concealed Carry Permit to put it in a case?

This guy is nuts...At least Monette can make a heavy horn look good.

M.

rebelatheart · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 1:44 pm Post subject:

I think it would look great with the "flying chiken" decal on it, like they used to put on the hood of the old Pontiac Trans Am. Also maybe hang a few christmas lights on it, just to put us all in the mood.
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"Daddy, this piccolo makes me want to cuss."

trumpetmike · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 2:02 pm Post subject:

Imagine a whole band on these instruments.

You could have a matching set of bell designs, not just the same colour, but the same lightning bolts, braces, everything!

Wonder if he does tubas...

trump_it · Veteran Member Joined: 16 Mar 2003 Posts: 319

That may be the first million- dollar trumpet section!

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2003 All-State Musician

trumpetmike · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 2:11 pm Post subject:

Wonder how much it would be to outfit my trumpet ensemble?

I have a piece for 36 players - wonder if he does Bass trumpets?

Now that would be an impressive look!

Imagine 36 of those pointing at you!!!

roynj · Heavyweight Member Joined: 19 Oct 2002 Posts: 2065

Does anyone ever buy these horrid creatures? Please tell me no.

Fast Freddy · Regular Member Joined: 12 Sep 2003 Posts: 99

Hmm, I would have marketed that a little differently......

Transform your pitiful, skinny, Paris Hilton-like figure into something more Schwarzennegerish with the new Harrelson prototype trumpet!

What a workout it must be hoisting that thing to your chops all day. Not to mention, it's just flat out... ugly. I'm not a sheet-metal-panel-horn kinda guy. Taylor's Phoenix is about the only horn of that genre I care for.

Nice post Patches, and you almost made it all the way to the end without mentioning Schilke, lol.

Take care!

trump_it · Veteran Member Joined: 16 Mar 2003 Posts: 319

[ This Message was edited by: trump_it on 2003-12-07 20:28 ]

trumpetmike · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 2:46 pm Post subject:

Perhaps we should send him a Schilke??

May keep Patches happy

PatchesTheCat · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 3:21 pm Post subject:

I think I would vomit if I saw a Harrelson modified Schilke. It would be considered sacriligous or something...end of the world type stuff you know? It would be like taking a Victoria Secret Model and injecting her with fat. It just woudn't be right. Don't waste your money on Harrelson, this would be well worth the investment:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2579223999&category=16214

Regards.

MoeTheCat · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 3:31 pm Post subject:

I heard Patches ranting in the other room and had to check out the forum... I have never liked the look of the heavy horns with all the extra bracing. I have never liked the way they played, either. All the heavy Monette's I played at ITG felt unresponsive and (IMO) lacked any character in their sound. They might make a nice lamp, though - albeit an expensive one.

Oh, Patches, did you take out the garbage?
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Bundy POS model Bb (no more cash after C)

PatchesTheCat · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 3:35 pm Post subject:

Nah man, it's not filled to the top yet.

pjtpt · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 4:48 pm Post subject:

If Flash Gordon played the trumpet he'd play this.

They oughta call this one the "Stupid Thing".

jhatpro · Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2003 5:08 pm Post subject:

Quick, call Emeril. One of his missing food processors has turned up.
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Jim Hatfield/Chicago Area
"The notes are in the horn. Find them." Mingus

[ This Message was edited by: jhatpro on 2003-12-06 20:09 ]

trumplyr · Posted: Sun Dec 07, 2003 2:54 am Post subject:

PatchesTheCat says:
"I'm sorry if this sounds derogatory, but I think it looks stupid. "

CAN I GET AN AMEN ??