Hi C's Steroids and Pirates

orenthal resets · Regular Member Joined: 18 May 2003 Posts: 45

Hey There,
I really want a principal trumpet job and I hear Steroids is the ticket! I mean I want to sound really big and REALLY LOUD!! I am sure that getting roided up can help. Are there any big time principal trumpets that use them? I also hear they boost confidence which you need because they also shrink other things that may take away from your confidence. Will this expand my vital capacity and give me the "edge" I am looking for?
I want to know because I am all about playing loud!
War Pirates

MrClean · Posted: Tue May 27, 2003 6:59 am Post subject:

Goodbye.

trumpetgeek234 · Posted: Tue May 27, 2003 9:03 am Post subject:

I'd go with this! I have been doing it for years and it really works. You have to make sure that you don't practice the trumpet while you are building your chop muscles that way. Who wants to practice anyway?!?

Then if you are going to audition for a really big job you start practicing the trumpet one day before the audition and run your repertoire through. But make sure to play every excerpt as loudly as possible. The audition committe is not sitting there to hear you play piano, you always have to play fff, otherwise you won't have a chance!

Best of luck
PB

JoseLindE4 · Heavyweight Member Joined: 18 Apr 2003 Posts: 791

Listen to the Hulkster, he knows what he's talking about. I still remember him body slamming me in Wrestle Mania. What do you do when the Hulkster comes down on you in Wrestle Mania?
Consider me a Hulkamaniac.

Andre the Giant

[ This Message was edited by: JoseLindE4 on 2003-05-27 12:07 ]

TossedSalad · Veteran Member Joined: 06 May 2003 Posts: 236

I thought Andre The Giant was dead.............

Jimmy "Super-Fly" Snuka RULES!!!!!!!!

TossedSalad

trpt-master · Veteran Member Joined: 02 Apr 2003 Posts: 352

I would put money down on KEN SHAMROCK of the Ultimate Fighting Championship series over any fighter in the world. This would have to be a street fight of course but folks you owe it to youself to check this guy out! This guy will not tap out!

In Peace,

TM

TossedSalad · Veteran Member Joined: 06 May 2003 Posts: 236

He does look pretty mean.....

http://www.sherdog.com/fightfinder/displayfighter.cfm?fighterid=4

TossedSalad

elbobogrande · Posted: Tue May 27, 2003 10:59 am Post subject:

Mr. Clean,
Do they really do drug testing at auditions, or was that in jest, too?
Thanks,
John
_________________
theblueone2002(AT)aol(DOT)com
"What? You mean to tell me that Rimsky and Korsakov were both named Nicolai?"

allofyougetalife · Veteran Member Joined: 19 Mar 2003 Posts: 207

I once ripped the high A in Mahler 5 with so much force and firepower, that the comittee immediately instructed the proctor to get a urine sample.

Since I had a poppyseed muffin with my banana that morning, I tested positive and was immediately disqualified.

AOYGAL

[ This Message was edited by: allofyougetalife on 2003-05-27 14:58 ]

Strawdoggy · Posted: Tue May 27, 2003 1:29 pm Post subject:

Hey, if you desire to play high and loud, you might just get all "roided" up.

Might I suggest "preparation H"?

Joe Camel · Heavyweight Member Joined: 20 May 2003 Posts: 545

If you want a big dark sound, try the new Cinderblock 2000 trumpet. You may need roids to hold it up but after that the horn should take care of it all. As we all know, the heavier the instrument the better. Use an asthma inhaler just before walking on stage to open you up. Epinephrine is also a good idea for a sudden burst of strength, will, and fury. You may be able to have an orthodontist fit you with some sort of brace behind your teeth for more pressure or get your teeth removed and put in some new ones made of stainless steel. Ideally they should be anchored deep in the bone with some dental posts.

Good Luck and continue to seek out new levels of volume and edge,
Joseph Camel

EBjazz · Posted: Wed May 28, 2003 8:54 pm Post subject:

Dude, I guess you missed this article from last summer: (To the day, I might add!)

From Reuters news service San Bernadino County Sun http://www.sbsun.com/

TRUMPET STAR ADMITS ILLEGAL DRUG USE

AP network1452/ 5/29/02 artSBSUN47/

After years of speculation that some of the music world's top high note
trumpet artists or lead players were using illegal range-building drugs, a
former Stan Kenton lead trumpet disclosed that he used steroids.

Sid (The Hat) Febreschi, a veteran of the big bands, nightclubs, and
Broadway musicals became the first trumpet player to publicly acknowledge
using performance enhancing drugs.

In an article that will appear in the upcoming issue of Jazziz magazine,
Febreschi stated that he began taking the illegal, range-enhancing drug in
1972, when he was lead trumpet with the legendary band leader, Stan Kenton.

"It's no secret what's going on out there" Febreschi said. "Most if not all
the high note players juice up. It's part of what's happening. They joke and
talk about it at dinner."

"There's money in playing high," Febreschi continued, "If I don't do it,
some young juiced-up punk is gonna' just come in and take my place."

Current Las Vegas lead trumpeter Dan Smiley says "I played with Sid for over
ten years. He was never one to hide anything. He was using 'droids all the
time we played together. It's not a big deal, though. Everybody does it.
Hell, I haven't worked out of Schlossburg since the Nixon administration."

Dr. Roger Boughton of Maryland State Medical School has studied the
fascination that the world has for high note trumpet artists. "When one
hears the soaring sound of Maynard Ferguson, one is taken back to a time
when music was pure and troubles were few. Due to this phenomena, there has
been an unnatural demand placed on the lead trumpet player. The modern lead
trumpet player is now expected to have a loud "G", which twenty years ago
was limited to a fortunate few."

The effects of steroid use vary from player to player, but Febreschi at 60
swears by them. "Hell, look at Doc and Maynard. These guys are well into
their 70's and they peal the paint off your shiny new car there sonny."

To read this article in it's entirety click on
http://www.sbsun.com/news/articles/0502/29/new123.asp

Eric Bolvin
Trumpet, Arranger, Composer, Educator
SF Bay Area
http://www.bolvinmusic.com
http://www.mp3.com/EricBolvin
408.236.2009
_________________
Eric Bolvin
http://bolvinmusic.com/product/the-modern-jazz-trumpet-method/
www.bolvinmusic.com

308WIN · Posted: Thu May 29, 2003 4:43 am Post subject:

Yeah man,
I shoot 'em right into my face!! I love haveing chops with that "ripped, onion skin" look.....
I can't have kids, but who cares when you can make the bell split?! To make things go faster, I do the Ghitalla "pencil" excercise with a 6 foot section of re-bar instead. Hoooooahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

"The Crusher"

RGale · Heavyweight Member Joined: 28 Dec 2002 Posts: 2818

Well, now I know why I didn't win those auditions!