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LittleRusty Heavyweight Member
Joined: 11 Aug 2004 Posts: 12664 Location: Gardena, Ca
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Posted: Tue Jun 02, 2020 3:31 pm Post subject: Be glad you only cut off your finger... |
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To avoid derailing a thread that I had already previously derailed, I thought I should add a topic here to solicit other thoughts.
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One of my pet peeves is someone trying to make someone feel better by telling them it could have been worse.
This particular case was the old saw "be glad you don't play the violin, then you really couldn't afford your instrument".
Gee thanks. I already know I am poor and don't need a reminder that others are much richer than I am and can afford an expensive instrument.
This happens in many different arenas. For instance, sharing one had/has a medical issue often triggers some "sympathetic" person to chime in with a story of an anecdote with bad outcome.
Hence the title of this thread:
Be glad you only cut off your finger, it could have been your hand instead.
Well now I am totally glad I cut off my finger. SMH.
Anybody have any other examples? |
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Brad361 Heavyweight Member
Joined: 16 Dec 2007 Posts: 7080 Location: Houston, TX.
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Posted: Tue Jun 02, 2020 4:11 pm Post subject: |
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I spent about five years on a local crisis hotline as a crisis intervention counselor. One of the first things discussed in the rather extensive training was this very thing, trying to help someone feel better by pointing out how much worse it could have been. That simply doesn’t work, and is probably more likely to annoy the person than anything else.
As you said, it’s simple: how many times has someone used this approach in trying to help you? Did it help? Pretty unlikely.
Brad _________________ When asked if he always sounds great:
"I always try, but not always, because the horn is merciless, unpredictable and traitorous." - Arturo Sandoval |
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